Help Me To See It From God's Eye

a Good man said to me: "God doesn't always give us what we want but He always give us what we need" on my case today I really need to believe what a good man has said to me.

I really need to see it from God's eyes,.. to see that it wasn't good enough for me or even me who wasn't good enough for it,..

I do believe in God,.. in destiny that someday I'm gonna be what I'm trying to be right now,..

-thanks for everything, the chance, even it says not now-

...APOLOGIZE ...

I'm holding on your rope,

Got me ten feet off the ground
I'm hearin what you say but I just can't make a sound
You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around, and say that...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

I'd take another chance, take a fall
Take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat
But it's nothing new
I loved you with a fire red-
Now it's turning blue, and you say...
"Sorry" like the angel heaven let me think was you
But I'm afraid...

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late

It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
It's too late to apologize, yeah
I said it's too late to apologize, yeah-
I'm holdin on your rope, got me ten feet off the ground...

sekarang ini gw gi sering muter lagu ini di laptop gw,.. It's too late to apologize,... meaning full banget buat hidup gw saat ini,.. gw benci knapa smuanya musti kayak gini sih??? apa bener apa yg dikatain orang slama ini??? jujur gw ga mo ngeyakinin diri gw klo jawab nya adalah YA,.. is it really too late to apologize??? I'll give you a second chance,.. for you I will as always,.. just be honest to ourself okey,..

Regret

Regret comes in all shapes and sizes

Some are small,..

Like when we do a bad thing for a good reason

Some are bigger,..

Like when we let down a friend

Some of us escape the pangs of regret by making the right choice

Some of us have a little time for regret

Because we’re looking forward to the future,..

Ga satu moment pun yang gw jalanin bareng kmu itu masuk dalam kategori REGRET

Just want you to know bout that Za,..

A man once sang to me:

Look at you.. you’re saving the world on your own
But it passes so slow
‘cause In a city of devil we live
Where I can feel the fire of the city light burn
You know what??? It’s really hard to find an angel in hell,..
It’s like I’m flying alone and I feel like I don’t belong here
And It’s bad cause I can’t tell right from wrong
And why do I have been here so long???
So I guess.. I can’t make my way back home
What if I wanted you here with me right now???
Would you join me sit right next to me in this city of devil,...
For God sake I can’t accept NO answer for this time,..
So what would you say???

...(being old) A Quarter Of Century...

3 November 2008

“aku memang terlanjur mencintaimu,.. dan tak pernah sesali itu,.. seluruh jiwa telah keserahkan,.. menggenggam janji setiaku,.. ku mohon jangan jadikan semua ini alasan kau menyakiti ku,.. meskipun cinta mu tak hanya untuk ku, tapi coba lah sejenak mengerti,...”

Agh,.. sapa sih yang nelpon gw malem2 gini??? Ehm,.. nomor asing nih??? Perasaan yang tau no axis gw dia Cuma doang? Apa mungkin emang dia yang nelpon gw??? Tapi ga mungkin juga semenjak kita perang hebat kemaren dia mo “ngalah” buat nelpon gw duluan???

Gw: allow

Yang nelpon gw: lama amat sih lo angkat nya?

Gw: oh,.. elo Ky (dengan suara yang ga semangat setelah tau yang nelpon gw bukan dia)

Yang nelpon gw: sorry kayak nya lo gi ngeharepin telpon dari orang laen ya?

Gw: ya.. gitu deh ky,..

Yang nelpon gw: happy birthday anyway ya dude, blom telat kan gw ngucapinnya?

Gw: Ya blom lah,.. gw kan pas lahir juga jam 11 malem itu artinya lo ngucapinya kecepetan 1,5 jam Ky..

Yang nelpon gw: whakakaka syukur deh klo gw ga telat ngucapinnya

Gw: thanx anyway

Yang nelpon gw: gmana kabar orang bukopin? Dapet apa dari dia?

Gw: ga dapet apa-apa Cuma sms ucapan selamet doang

Yang nelpon gw: Cuma itu doang?

Gw: yups...

Yang nelpon gw: kok bisa? lo gi da masalah ma dia?

Gw: emang sih kemaren gw sempet perang mulut kecil ma dia, ya.. jd gini deh akhir nya

Yang nelpon gw: perang mulut gmana?

Gw: ya ada lah masalah yang bikin gw emosi ma dia,.. mungkin maksud dia Cuma becanda tapi dia juga ga tau kalo gw baru dapet masalah yang bikin gw emosi yah,.. dia juga yang kena semprot dari gw

Yang nelpon gw: oh,.. dah lo jelasin duduk perkaranya kan?

Gw: udah lah,.. tapi yah.. gini lah akhir nya, lo tau dia kan paling ga mau ngalah n gw juga cape klo musti ngalah mulu, ga asik banget klo dia gi marah diem terus.. bukan nya diomoning biar masalah nya cepet kelar, kayak anak kecil banget Ky,.. padahal lo tau sendiri dia ama gw tuaan sapa

Yang nelpon gw: iya juga sih,.. trus gmana dong?

Gw: ya gimana-gimana... yang jelas buat kali ini gw dah minta maaf ma dia, tapi buat ngalah lagi kayak nya ga deh Ky,.. dah cukup kemarenan gw ngalah mulu

Yang nelpon gw: sayang lo klo ampe kehilangan barang bagus, pa lagi hubungan lo dah mayan jauh

Gw: bodo ah,.. males juga lama-lama gw ma dia Ky,..

Yang nelpon gw: ya udah mo gw bantuin ngomong ma dia ga? Sapa tau hubungan lo bedua masih bisa diselametin

Gw: ga usah bego deh Ky,.. ngapaian juga lo ngomong ma dia,.. kalo pun ada keiinginan dari dia buat ngeberesin hubungan nya ama gw, gw pengen nya itu dateng dari diri dia sendiri bukan dari lo,.. ga enak dia nya juga klo musti lo ikut campur masalah gw ma dia

Yang nelpon gw: ok gw Cuma nawarin doang kok, btw bsok balik ngantor mo ngikut nonton bareng anak2 ga?

Gw: males ah gw klo nonton,.. gi pengen karaoke di inul nih,.. karaoke-an aja Ky,.. gw yang bayar deh

Yang nelpon gw: halah,.. ya udah ntar gw ngomong ma anak2 dulu, tapi klo jadi karaoke lo yang bayar yah

Gw: ok

Yang nelpon gw: yah weish deh, bsok gw telpon lagi ok

Gw: sip

Yang nelpon gw: happy blessing birth day dude

Gw: thank you Ky,...

Bila rasa ku ini rasa mu,.. sanggupkah engkau menahan sakit nya terkhianati cinta yang kau jaga,.. coba,.. bayangkan kembali bertapa hancur nya hati ini kasih,... semua telah terjadi,...

Too good to be true (again)